The last six or so months have been the start of something incredible. They’ve flown past, and barely a day goes by without someone with older children telling me to cherish this time because it’s over so fast. I don’t want to miss a second of these babyhood days, but then I think of how much you’re missing out on.
Since becoming a single mum six months ago I’ve reached a state of acceptance within myself. That hasn’t happened without first visiting feelings of guilt and shame though. Were they put there by others or myself? Either way, I feel there’s a lot of work still to be done on society’s attitudes towards single parents.
When it comes to parenting, everyone has an opinion. Even people without children have an opinion on everything, from when (and how) you should wean to the importance of establishing a routine early on, their sleeping position and the clothes they’re wearing. Nothing, it seems, is safe from criticism or someone’s prying mind.
Motherhood is a total game-changer. I kinda knew that before embarking on this crazy, beautiful and messy journey though. What I didn’t anticipate fully was exactly how life would be different from before. Being a mum has brought with it a few surprises that I’ve been loving.
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Although 20 weeks isn’t exactly a milestone age (we’re way past three months and quite a bit short of six months), now feels like as good a time as any to share my breastfeeding story so far. I predominantly breastfeed but use formula every day, so hopefully there’s something here you can relate to however you’re feeding!
Both before and during pregnancy, I practiced yoga on and off for about 10 years. It’s something that I find chills me out, strengthens my core and makes me more mindful of my posture. I was made up when I realised it’s also something I can do with my baby.
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Assuming he is cisgendered, my baby boy will grow into a man. As a white male not living below the poverty line, he’ll enjoy a certain set of privileges not bestowed on everyone. Being a parent, it’s my duty to raise a good human, and being a mum of a boy, it’s my duty to show him how to treat women. This is my ‘open letter’ to him on that subject.
